Friday, February 28, 2014

A Lesson From Our Good Friend O!



2 Timothy 1:16-18
16 May the Lord grant mercy to the household of Onesiphorus, because he often refreshed me and was not ashamed of my chain; 17 when he arrived in Rome, he eagerly searched for me and found me 18 —may the Lord grant that he will find mercy from the Lord on that day! And you know very well how much service he rendered in Ephesus.”

As leaders we are often the targets of criticism from the people we lead. This is in part because leaders are, generally, more vocal and visible, and intend to shake up the norm; most people don’t like that last part, but need it desperately! We must understand that as leaders opposition is certain to come, and knowing how to deal with it is crucial. I listed Second Timothy 1:16-18 above as an encouragement in dealing with our critics.

The Context: In Second Timothy 1:16-18, Paul recounts his time as a prisoner and when his friend, Onesiphorus, came to his aid and encouraged him during this difficult time. In like fashion to modern practice, prisoners were regarded as shameful criminals who violated Roman law. Generally, they were seen as a threat to a properly functioning society. However, prisons, unlike the modern system, were “holding tanks” for criminals awaiting trial, and therefore could be brutal (Acts 16:23-24; 2 Cor 6:5, 11:23) or relatively humane (Acts 28:17-31). In the case of Second Timothy, Paul’s stay in prison was brutal (2 Tim 2:19). Imagine the scenario: you have been building churches, appointing leaders, and preaching the gospel; you have built relationships with your team members and feel as if your time with them has been valuable. You then get thrown into prison unjustly and each of those relationships crumbles under the weight of public humiliation to which your friends cannot bear. We see that those same people who had accompanied Paul and worked alongside him in the ministry had now abandoned him. How lonely was Paul? Imagine him questioning himself, or God, about his calling, or even if he aptitude as a leader. Who could he talk to about these frustrations (his friends had abandoned him)? His greatest helpers became his greatest critics. For Paul then, Onesiphorus became that breath of fresh air and hope that he needed. The word Paul uses of Onesiphorus is that he “refreshed” him. The Greek (anapsychō) has a range of meaning: (1) breathing space; (2) revive; (3) refresh; (4) and experience relief from trouble. Imagine if Onesiphorus would have acted like the rest of Paul’s friends. Would Paul have become too discouraged and given up? And if Paul had given up, where would the church be today?   

The Goal: Who is the Onesiphorus’s in your life? Again, we are certain to have criticism as leaders, but who helps you remember the good qualities about yourself as an individual and leader? Who provides a refreshing and reviving godly experience for you? The goal is to let the Onesiphorus’s outshine the constant critics. However, critics can be good, and they have their place in the life of a leader (I will address this point next time), but they should not dominate your meetings, conversations, or life. Practically, this means that we develop trusted relationships with others around us who encourage and build us up—they should become our default contacts in the midst of difficulty and trial. Personally, I have a number of these types of people, and generally I will sandwich them in-between my more “difficult” or taxing meetings so that I am refreshed and personally ready to endure what was said prior and what might be said after—I find that their encouragement carries me through the day. Additionally, each of us should strive to be Onesiphorus’s to those around us—fools realize that there are millions of opportunities to be a critic, but only the wise can see through those opportunities and into the deeper truths of the Spirit that declares, “From this point on we won’t recognize people by human standards… for if anyone is in Christ, that person is a new creation” (2 Cor 5:16-17).

Grace and Peace,

-Pastor Mark
             



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