2 Timothy 1:16-18
“16 May the Lord
grant mercy to the household of Onesiphorus, because he often refreshed me and
was not ashamed of my chain; 17 when he arrived in Rome, he
eagerly searched for me and found me 18 —may the Lord grant
that he will find mercy from the Lord on that day! And you know very well how
much service he rendered in Ephesus.”
As leaders we are often the targets
of criticism from the people we lead. This is in part because leaders are,
generally, more vocal and visible, and intend to shake up the norm; most people
don’t like that last part, but need it desperately! We must understand that as
leaders opposition is certain to come, and knowing how to deal with it is
crucial. I listed Second Timothy 1:16-18 above as an encouragement in dealing
with our critics.
The Context: In Second Timothy 1:16-18, Paul recounts his time as a
prisoner and when his friend, Onesiphorus, came to his aid and encouraged him
during this difficult time. In like fashion to modern practice, prisoners were
regarded as shameful criminals who violated Roman law. Generally, they were
seen as a threat to a properly functioning society. However, prisons, unlike
the modern system, were “holding tanks” for criminals awaiting trial, and
therefore could be brutal (Acts 16:23-24; 2 Cor 6:5, 11:23) or relatively
humane (Acts 28:17-31). In the case of Second Timothy, Paul’s stay in prison
was brutal (2 Tim 2:19). Imagine the scenario: you have been building churches,
appointing leaders, and preaching the gospel; you have built relationships with
your team members and feel as if your time with them has been valuable. You
then get thrown into prison unjustly and each of those relationships crumbles under
the weight of public humiliation to which your friends cannot bear. We see that
those same people who had accompanied Paul and worked alongside him in the
ministry had now abandoned him. How lonely was Paul? Imagine him questioning
himself, or God, about his calling, or even if he aptitude as a leader. Who
could he talk to about these frustrations (his friends had abandoned him)? His
greatest helpers became his greatest critics. For Paul then, Onesiphorus became
that breath of fresh air and hope that he needed. The word Paul uses of
Onesiphorus is that he “refreshed” him. The Greek (anapsychō) has a range of meaning: (1) breathing space; (2) revive;
(3) refresh; (4) and experience relief from trouble. Imagine if Onesiphorus
would have acted like the rest of Paul’s friends. Would Paul have become too
discouraged and given up? And if Paul had given up, where would the church be
today?
The Goal: Who is the Onesiphorus’s in your life? Again, we are
certain to have criticism as leaders, but who helps you remember the good
qualities about yourself as an individual and leader? Who provides a refreshing
and reviving godly experience for you? The goal is to let the Onesiphorus’s
outshine the constant critics. However, critics can be good, and they have
their place in the life of a leader (I will address this point next time), but
they should not dominate your
meetings, conversations, or life. Practically, this means that we develop
trusted relationships with others around us who encourage and build us up—they
should become our default contacts in the midst of difficulty and trial.
Personally, I have a number of these types of people, and generally I will sandwich
them in-between my more “difficult” or taxing meetings so that I am refreshed
and personally ready to endure what was said prior and what might be said
after—I find that their encouragement carries me through the day. Additionally,
each of us should strive to be Onesiphorus’s to those around us—fools realize
that there are millions of opportunities to be a critic, but only the wise can
see through those opportunities and into the deeper truths of the Spirit that
declares, “From this point on we won’t recognize people by human standards… for
if anyone is in Christ, that person is a new creation” (2 Cor 5:16-17).
Grace and Peace,
-Pastor Mark
